Tears of Shame
by Deeny1
Summary: What if Draco's mission wasn't the only reason that brought out Draco's emotions? What if it involved a girl that taught him to do so? What if they fell in love and she wanted to stay by his side even if it meant death? A deep story about love DO&CO! R
1. Hogwart Rumors

**Chapter 1 – Hogwart Rumors**

"You're in Gryffindor. . . you're in Gryffindor," I repeatedly said to myself while walking towards the girls washroom.

I kept saying and repeating the same words over and over again until I walked into the girl's washroom and looked in the mirror. I leaned over the sink still repeating those words. I felt no other feeling towards Draco other than that beautiful tingly feeling in my stomach, and I knew that I could never get myself to hate him the way every other Gryffindor in the school does.

_Its weird, isn't it? A girl in Gryffindor with glasses, brown hair and the most innocent smile would fall in love with a blond, blue eyed, tough and aggressive boy in Slytherin_- That's what everyone said. All I could remember were the whispers I heard in the halls while making my way down to Defense Against the Dark Arts Class. Of course the word would get spread around when Lavender Brown caught Draco and I walking outside Hogwarts together this morning. All we did was talk, but of course people would turn the story into something it wasn't. Draco and I would be walking outside Hogwarts one day, and then suddenly, a story about him and I making out would be heard by the whole school.

I rubbed my eyes a couple of times, took a deep breath and looked in the mirror for the last time. I made my way out of the washroom and walked to Defense Against the Dark Arts class. I could see my friends, Ginny and Hermione, sitting together listening to Snape as he was talking. Hermione of course was jotting down notes. Crabbe and Goyle were also listening-or rather staring at- Snape. My gut wasn't strong enough to get me to look at Draco- _too bad there isn't a spell for anti-love . . . or maybe there is . . . I'd have to ask Hermione sometime. _The rest of the class was listening to Snape, with the exception of some who were half asleep, and Neville of course; he looked as frightened as a house elf about to receive punishment. But who can blame him? Snape is pretty bloodcurdling. Harry and Ron were the first to notice I had entered the room. As I made my way into the class, the rest had began to notice too. Snape stopped talking and turned around.

"Lucinda," Snape spoke my name in his dark cold voice. "I see you got lost along the way to class?" Snape said as the students' laughs and whispers followed.

Snape turned his head away from my direction towards the class.

"STOP!" Snape yelled. The class froze.

"Talking," he softly added. "You can take a seat beside Mr. Malfoy," Snape pointed. "And for being late . . . 10 points from Gryffindor!" Snape just loved finding excuses to take points away from Gryffindor.

My head rose up and Draco turned his face, pretending not to notice me. I walked slowly and very cautiously. I could feel everyone's eyes follow me. My notebook fell out of my hands onto the floor as I attempted to place it on the desk.

"Butterfingers!" Crabbe laughed as he elbowed Draco, but Draco remained blank faced and was still pretending I wasn't there.

I picked up my notebook and took a seat. Snape continued teaching. I was tense throughout the class, and I could definitely see Draco was too. Both of us couldn't focus at all. We were both fidgeting with our quills. I was doodling while Draco kept itching the back of his neck. While this was happening, I was thinking of a plan. I didn't want to feel this way around Draco for the whole year, so I decided that after class I was going to confront him. There was no need to be this way. We didn't do anything shameful. I just saw him outside this morning and needed to know what I missed in class, thats all-maybe. I don't understand why a Slytherin with a Gryffindor is such a big deal anyway.

"Class dismissed!" Snape suddenly announced. Everyone gathered their books in a hurry and headed out. Draco seemed to be the fastest one at it, so I ran out of the classroom and into the hallway after him.

"Malfoy!…Malfoy!…Draco!…Drake!" I yelled after him.

He seemed to be going faster and faster as I yelled after him, but I ran quick enough until I caught him. I grabbed his shoulder and turned him around. All I did was stare at him with vulnerability. Nothing seemed to come out of my mouth. He just looked around to make sure nobody was looking. I then grabbed his arm and lead him to a small quiet staircase where nobody was around to disturb-or even see us. We were both silent for a moment. I kept looking at him wide eyed, but he just looked down.

"Why're you being like this?" I asked. Silence filled the air again.

"Like what?" He responded as I rolled my eyes.

"Don't act like you don't know, because I know you do."

"Well you know the answer to why I'm being like this." He finally looked up.

"There's nothing for us to be ashamed of," I said with half a smile. "We were only . . . only talking."

"Thats not all, Lucinda," He finally spoke.

"I opened myself up to you. I've never been this open with a person before, not even my family. What I'm ashamed of is . . . is that I opened up to _you,_ told _you_ my feelings about being . . ." he hesitated.

"About being the chosen one . . . about how Voldemort picked me . . . and you're just a girl in Gryffindor I saw today and completely . . . possibly fell for. Now you know everything. You know that I'm out to kill Dumbledore for my own life, you know everything! I'm so stupid-just so stupid that I told you . . . but I had a feeling-a feeling that I could . . . could trust you. There was just something in your eyes that made me spill like a potion that had fallen, and it felt like I couldn't stop telling you everything because . . . because you were the only person in my life that . . ." His piercing blue eyes seemed to look right through me. I could feel my stomach flip. _Those blue eyes, that blond hair, that perfect skin . . . _I abruptly shook my head for a moment ignoring my feelings. I had to say something.

"That what?" I said curiously.

"That listened!" He hissed, but I knew his hissing wasn't meant for me, but to those who never gave him a chance. A chance to open-up, a chance to make friendship, a chance to show his feelings and a chance to just love. I felt sympathy for him. It felt like my heart was just slowly bleeding away with every word he said, but I was angry. Angry because he was ashamed.

"I'll always listen to you . . . but what kills me is that you're ASHAMED! There's no reason to be ashamed . . . the feeling of shame just doesn't fit in this situation! Can't you see that you should feel brave that you were able to tell me these things rather than ashamed!?" I cried.

I felt tears running down my cheek. Draco reached his hand to try to wipe them away but I was too angry to let him. I gathered myself and left up the stairs, heading to Charms class, leaving him there to think silently.


	2. The Confession

**Chapter 2- Seeing Him Again**

Classes were over for the day and it was time for dinner. As I made my way down to the Great Hall, I could only think about what I had said to Draco in that quiet staircase. I was glad I had told him what I thought. A Slytherin being able to open-up to a Gryffindor is stronger than any spell, any strength and any wizard . . . even . . . even stronger than Voldemort! I was flattered that he opened up to me. But he being ashamed kills me. I want him to enjoy talking to me about his feelings, but will that ever happen? I don't know.

I continued to think about the conversation me and Draco had as I walked into the Great Hall. As I entered, I spotted Ginny and Hermione sitting with Ron and Harry. I never really had gotten to know Harry and Ron that well. Although I have had a few conversations with Harry before about how it was like facing Voldemort. He told me how upsetting it was to see Cedric die the year before. That really touched me. I can't even imagine seeing someone I knew getting killed right before my eyes.

I finally reached the table the four of them were sitting at. All of them froze at the sight of me. I froze too by the looks of surprise on their faces. I cautiously sat next to Ginny. Everyone finally looked away, but silence continued to fill the air.

"I'm starving!" I said looking around at all the food and trying to cut the tension between everyone. "What's the best dish tonight Ron? I know you've tried everything." I added as Ginny, Hermione and Harry's giggles followed. Ron only smiled.

"Well I really liked the chicken drumsticks. Has some sort of flavor to it I like . . . a little bit of lemon, pepper . . ."-

"We get the picture! The chicken is good . . . now let's dig in!" Ginny interrupted.

We all chuckled and reached for a drumstick. As I took a bite of the chicken- _which I must say was delicious_- I could see Draco right across the table sitting on the Slytherin table, and again, my stomach turned. I noticed that I wasn't wearing my glasses, so I had to squint my eyes to see what he was doing. I could certainly tell he was looking right at me. As I struggled to see, I noticed that he was not only looking at me, but also mouthing the words _meet me at the staircase._ I paused for a few seconds looking at him but then nodded slowly without expression. I was just too surprised that he was willing to meet me after everything that occurred. Still stunned at what had just happened, I noticed that Draco had already left his table.

"I have to go right now . . . I'll see you guys later tonight." I interrupted everyone's conversations.

"Lucinda! . . . you hardly ate, aren't you hungry?" Hermione said in a concerned tone.

"Uhh . . . no actually I had a snack right before this. I was too hungry to wait for dinner so I decided to eat," I lied.

"Where do you have to go?" Ginny asked.

I paused. "Professor Mcgonagall said she wanted to see me as soon as possible after I was done my dinner, and you know how strict she is!" I gave a fake giggle.

"Oh okay . . . then we'll see you later Lucinda! Hopefully you're not in trouble!" Ron gave a look of worry.

"No way! Lucinda couldn't be in trouble! And you never know . . . maybe Mcgonagall wants her on the Quiditch team. You guys remember how everyone thought I was in trouble when she called me to see her a couple of years ago . . ." Harry said.

"Yeah! It turned out that she wanted you on the team!" Ginny smiled at Harry.

"And you are quite good at flying the broom Lucinda. I was watching you the other day and I was quite impressed!" Ron added.

"Thanks for understanding everyone . . . I now have to go . . . Bye!" I said in a rush. As I got up, I could see Hermione's small eyes squinting at me, and that could only mean that she was thinking about what I had just said. I knew that she was not buying what I had told her because she just stared at me with arms crossed and with such a perplexed face. The other three were just talking about Quiditch, but of course Hermione being so smart, she'd catch on to me sooner or later. I could even feel Hermione's eyes follow me as I left the Great Hall.

When I was out, I gave a sigh of relief and continued making my way to the quiet staircase I had spoken to Draco in earlier that day. Once I reached the top of the tiny staircase, I could see Draco standing at the bottom of it looking right at me with such focus, and once again I couldn't help notice his shiny blond hair, electric blue eyes and perfect white skin.

"Hi," he said.

Pause.

"Hello," I responded.

"I need to tell you something. Something hard for me to say, but have to say anyways." He was staring right at me with wide eyes and a little bit of sadness to them.


	3. My Destiny

**So this is the third chapter, and I hope you enjoy it!  
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**I wrote this story because I've always loved the idea of Draco Malfoy finding love. And I always truly believed that love brings out the best in people and seeing the best in Draco really interests me, and hopefully interests you too.**

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If he didn't have that sad look in his eyes, I would have never guessed that he was about to say something that would hurt me, but his face did tell it all. After he said those words, silence filled the air as he stared at me. I knew he was staring because he wanted me to say something, so I opened my mouth waiting for something to come out.

"What do you want to say?" I asked slowly. If I had gone any faster with my words, I would have started bawling even though he hadn't said anything yet.

"I don't know how to say it-"

"Just say it!" I interrupted him. I just wanted him to say whatever he had to say as quickly as possible. I didn't want to feel anymore anxiety. I was already nervous about what he had stuck in his throat, but even more anxious that I had to wait to hear it.

"I don't think we should ever . . ." He slightly hesitated as he looked down at the ground. "We can't see each other anymore," He finally said looking back at me with sorrow in his eyes. My heart flipped, but not from the feelings I had towards him, but it was from the words that came out of his mouth. I was angry, but more sad than angry.

"What do you mean we can't see each other?" I asked quietly. If it wasn't for my feelings, I would have shouted, but raising my voice would have broken me down into tears. Draco bit his lip as he looked at my facial expression.

"I mean . . . I can't talk to you anymore, or see you," He said slowly as he stared into my eyes.

"So you're just going to pretend that you don't know me?" I asked in wretchedness with a slight antagonism to my voice. I was only halfway down the small staircase, but I wanted to run down and slap him across the face, but I knew that I only could imagine myself doing that. I knew that I would never be able to.

"It's not that I don't like you, or hate you or even not love you . . . It's just that . . ." He struggled with his words.

"It's that what, Draco? . . . That what? . . . That you're _Ashamed_?" I asked in fury as I stared at him in focus. He only looked away from me. I could tell that he was no longer ashamed because he had feelings for me. He was now ashamed of _being _ashamed.

"It's not that at all . . . It's not that! You don't understand. You don't know why I can't be with you! Just listen to me for one second!" He looked at me again with vulnerability. He ascended his way up the stairs towards me and had both of his hands on my shoulders. I looked at him with tears forming in my eyes. "I can't because of . . ." He hesitated as he cautiously looked around the staircase. "Because of Voldemort," he suddenly whispered. As soon as I heard the name, my mind went into a totally different state. My eyes began to slowly dry, and the weakness I felt in my knees became stiffness.

"Voldemort?" I whispered with force as he let go of my shoulders. He only nodded. "What do you mean? What does he have to do with us?"

"Come on Lucinda . . . how do you not know? If I don't . . . if I don't complete the mission he assigned me, he won't only kill _me_ Lucinda. Voldemort is smart enough to go after the people I love too," He said quietly with fear in his eyes. I somewhat understood what he meant, but I still didn't understand how Voldemort would find out about me.

"First of all . . . _never_ think about dying," I said as I looked at him in concern. "And second of all . . . he _can't_ find out about me if you don't _tell _him!" He shook his head from left to right. I gave a look of confusion. Never in my life had I completely understood about Voldemort. I mean . . . I knew he was a murderer and one of the most evil wizards of all time, but I never understood his way of thinking. How could anyone be so evil that even after they die, they still want to kill? What was the purpose? And every time I think about him I get angry . . . angry because of my misunderstanding, but who can blame me? The evil mind is one complex thing to figure out.

"Trust me Lucinda . . . everything that happens at Hogwarts soon gets to Voldemort's ear," Draco said with confidence.

"How?" I curiously asked.

"Well some of the student's parents are death eaters you know . . . and soon they become one too, and when they do, they have to tell Voldemort everything that happens around here!" He quickly said as he stared at me in concentration, but suddenly his face began to sadden as he looked away from me. "Students like me," he faintly added. We both stood in the staircase in complete silence, and as the moments passed, I couldn't help but feel like there was a part of me that didn't want to give up fighting to be with Draco. So much of me had let go and had given up, but the part of me that just couldn't let go of Draco was my heart. I thought I loved him . . . I _knew_ I lovedhim, and if loving meant death . . . I'd consider it. I was scared. Scared of death and my life ending, but I always truly believed that once I reached my destiny, I'd die. And what if my destiny was being with Draco? I knew that no matter what I did, I'd have to end up with him.

"I don't care," I finally whispered as I reached over to the side of his face and held my hand against it. He just looked up at me with confusion.

"About what?" he asked.

"I don't care if Voldemort kills me. I'm not going to let fear get in my way of being with you," I said with vulnerability in my eyes.

"You're crazy! No Lucinda . . . Don't even think about it!" He yelled as he pushed my hand away.

"I'm going to stay by your side! I don't care if you push me away . . . but right now you're in my life . . . and I'm not letting go!" I yelled with aggression. I meant every word I had said. So many things in life pass by, but it's what a person holds onto that becomes their life's focus. Draco passed me by . . . and I hooked onto him.

"YOU ARE LETTING GO! NO WAY WILL I LET YOU BE IN DANGER THE WAY _I _AM . . . OKAY? . . . I HELD ONTO YOU TOO LUCINDA, AND NOW I HAVE TO PROTECT YOU!" He yelled. I just stood there as tears flowed down my cheeks. I hated how selfish he was being. I finally wiped the tears off my face as I turned my back towards him and left up the stairs to my room. I had nothing to say to him because I knew that no matter how much I explained my feelings, he wouldn't understand. He needed me, and I knew he wanted me to stay with him and support him through the most frightening time of his life. I was the only one that listened to him, and he was the only one that had ever opened up to me the way he has. He was struggling between what he wanted and what he thought the right thing was, but he didn't realize that the right thing _was_ the thing he wanted.

I finally reached my room and as I opened the door, I saw Hermione and Ginny sitting in their beds talking. As soon as they saw me come into the room, they leapt out of bed and came rushing towards me.

"What took you so long?!" Hermione asked in worry, but I ignored the question and walked towards my bed. The two just stood there waiting for me to answer.

"I don't want to talk about it," I said as I sat on my bed. Hermione and Ginny followed and sat beside me.

"Are you okay?" Ginny asked quietly. Hermione just stared with worry in her eyes.

"No . . . I'm not."

"Did you get in trouble from Professor Mcgonogall?" Hermione asked anxiously.

"No."

"Then why are you so down?" Ginny asked.

"I don't think you guys would be able to understand . . . or at least take it seriously," I said extending my legs onto my bed.

"Lucinda! How could you say that? Of course we'll understand, we're your friends, just trust us," Hermione said calmly as she placed her hand on my shoulder.

"Yeah . . . so spit it out," Ginny said. I suddenly got up from my laying position and sat up. I looked at them with sadness. They just stared back anxiously.

"I know his might sound crazy," I said as I looked straight at them in worry. "But . . . but I think I love someone."

"That's great! How's that bad? . . . That's awesome!" Ginny said with enthusiasm.

"Yeah . . . _how is_ that bad? Does this person already have a girlfriend?" Hermione asked in inquisitiveness. She knew that there was a catch to the situation I was in. I just kept looking back and fourth at the two. I was trying to decide if I should tell them, or keep it to myself. I didn't know how they would react to the situation or how they would think of me afterwards, but I knew that they were my friends and that I had to tell them.

"Who is it?!" Ginny blurted out excitedly as silence filled the air once more.

"It's . . . it's . . . Draco Malfoy," I finally said as I waited for their reactions.

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**Please Review****!**

So I have no reviews right now and I really need them to know how many want to see more of this story, because if nobody reviews I get the impression that people aren't interested and that I shouldn't publish it on FanFicton and that I should just leave it to myself. But other than that, I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it.

I'm thinking of writing the same story but in Draco's POV. What do you guys think?


	4. One Night Reunite

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You guys will really like this chapter. I find it to be very heart-warming, and I hope you do too!

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I just sat there waiting for the facials I thought they would give me, but the two remained blank faced. They stared a lot, but never brought a single emotion to their face. I wanted them to give me a look, or move in a certain way that would give me a sign about what they were feeling or thinking, but they didn't, and I was struggling, and the struggling soon became tears running down my cheeks. I was always the kind of person that never cried when they were sad. I always cried when I was angry, struggling, and sometimes even happy . . . but never sad. I looked away from the two and buried my face in my pillow as I started bawling, and that's when Hermione and Ginny made a move. I hated that. Why did people always make a move when it was too late, when they hurt someone or when they realize that they've made a mistake? I didn't know, and I didn't want it that way.

"Lucinda, it's okay, he's a jerk, I'm sure you're better off without him," Ginny said as she rubbed my back, but she didn't understand why I was crying. She thought it was because Draco had rejected me, but she didn't realize that it was much more complicated than that, and the worst thing was that I couldn't tell her. All I could do was cry.

"Lucinda . . . come on, it's alright, we've all gotten hurt this year," Hermione said with a warmth to her voice. After a few minutes had passed, I was still crying and the two had finally gotten off my bed and went over to the opposite end of the room to speak. They thought I wouldn't be able to hear them, but the room was so quiet that I could even hear the clock on the wall tick.

"I think we should leave her alone for a few minutes so she can clear her mind up," Hermione whispered to Ginny.

"I know . . . especially the 'clearing her mind' part. What does she see in that boy?" Ginny quietly hissed.

"Ginny, it's not like she can control her feelings, but I guess it is kind of bizarre. I wonder how _that_ happened," Hermione whispered back. "Hey listen, I think we should head out to the common room. I don't want her waking up. She needs the rest . . . look at her. She hasn't been herself for almost five days."

"Yeah, poor Lucinda. Let's go," Ginny whispered as the door shut behind them. As soon as the door was closed, I sat up from my laying position and leapt out of bed.

"_I haven't been myself? What is my self anyways?" _I thought. I was just angry that the two thought it was so crazy having feelings for Draco. It wasn't fair . . . they had never given him a chance to befriend them in the first place. I went over to the balcony doors and pushed them open. I walked onto the balcony, and a totally different feeling spread across my body. The cool air outside entered my body as I inhaled, and as I exhaled, I felt like all the bad feelings had left with my breath. It was as if the air outside had filtered my body. I closed my eyes and went to the edge of the balcony and held onto it. I felt the chill of the breeze running through my hair and I couldn't help but smile. Nature had always been one thing I loved. Being outside had always made me feel great, because it had always made me feel as if I was re-invented. After a few seconds of standing in the breeze, I opened my eyes wanting to also experience the view. The moon was shining over the lake and its reflection just sparkled over the water as if there were a bunch of diamonds beneath it. I could see and hear the trees beneath the balcony dancing in the wind. The air smelt of wood, and the fish that were swimming in the water. I suddenly felt new again; as if everything that happened that day was behind me, and that I could wake up the next morning with a fresh, new start.

As I stared at the night sky, I suddenly heard an unusual sound. I turned my face to my right. At first I didn't recognize who the person on the balcony farther from my right was, but soon the luminosity of his blond hair and blue eyes gave me an idea of who it might be. It was clearly Draco. Once I had realized it was him, my eyes widened and I couldn't take my eyes off him. It's not that I was surprised that he was standing out on his balcony. I was surprised because of what he was doing . . . he was crying. Tears ran down his cheeks and I could see them sparkle from the reflection of the moon and stars. Not only did tears run down his cheeks, but he also wept. I didn't know why he was weeping. Was it because of me? Or was he frightened because of him mission? . . . Or was it not being able to be with me _during_ his mission?

Seeing Draco in that state made me sad, but for some odd reason it also moved me. Draco had always been the tough, aggressive one that never showed much of his emotions. He always hid them from everyone. Aggression was always his shield. Seeing him like that made me want to be with him even more; it was as if his tears were speaking to me and yelling '_help me.' _He needed me, and I needed to be with him, but he had his barrier up.

As I stood there and looked at him from afar I was planning to speak with him the next day. I was going to tell him that weather he liked it or not, he had to let me stay with him, but as I stood there, I felt something else build up inside the pit of my stomach. I felt like I couldn't wait till tomorrow. I felt like I had to speak to him that very moment or I wouldn't be able to sleep that night. A new plan began to emerge. I looked at the wall between his balcony and mine. I could see bars attached to the wall and suddenly, my imagination turned on. Before I could think, my arm reached over to the bar and I held onto it. My foot placed itself on the other. I then began to climb sideways along the bars, towards the balcony Draco was standing in. I was surprised he had noticed me, but I assumed it was because my balcony was farther down from his. As I struggled my way towards him, I kept telling myself to not look down, but even if I had looked, it wouldn't have made a difference. I was too determined to reach him. Before I had realized, I had reached the last bar. I placed both of my hands on the edge of Draco's balcony and started pulling myself up. Once my head was over the edge, I could see Draco staring at me in alarm. At first he didn't recognize me, but once he did . . . he no longer looked alarmed, he was in shock.

"Lucinda!?" He yelled as he stood in front of my face. His legs were blocking my way, so I couldn't see what was in front of me. He finally reached over and gave me his hand. I grabbed onto it and he pulled me up. "What are you doing here? How-what-where- HOW'D YOU GET HEAR!?" He asked as I got off the balcony floor and stood up.

"My balcony is over there, and I saw you hear, and I wanted to see you," I said as I pointed towards the opposite direction.

"Well you must have wanted to see me pretty bad-" He said quickly but then stopped. "WHAT!? You climbed all the way from there to hear?" He pointed to the two different directions as I nodded. "Are you trying to kill yourself? Look how high it is from the ground!" He said looking down at the dancing trees. I wanted him to shut up, so I placed my index finger against his lips.

"You really need to calm down . . . I surprised you, we're happy, and . . . I'm not dead," I said smiling as I took my finger away from his face. He just stared at me with his beautiful blue eyes.

"You're right . . . but what did I tell you?" He whispered with worry in his eyes. "This is dangerous, I can't see you. You need to go," He said as he grabbed my arm and began towards the balcony doors. I just looked at him with annoyance as I yanked my arm away from him.

"Is anyone here right now?!" I asked in fury.

"No, but-"

"Nobody is here, no one can see us. I don't know what the problem is!" I shouted.

"We're outside!" He aggressively whispered. I looked at him with sadness. "I'm sorry, you're right," he suddenly said after moments of silence. He placed both hands on my face and looked into my eyes. I looked back. The moons reflection was shining off of his stunning blue eyes, and I couldn't help but notice his beautiful pink lips that almost looked orange. Before I had even realized, our faces began moving closer and closer together. I was so close to him that I could even here his faint breathing. I could feel his eyes look at mine, but before I had the chance to look back at his, our lips met. As I closed my eyes, I could feel the warmth of his lips against mine. They were so soft. If I hadn't known any better, I'd think that they were just two fluffy pillows against my face, and that I was only dreaming, but the best thing of all was that I wasn't dreaming; this was reality. Many minutes had passed as we stood there with our lips locked together, but it felt like seconds. As he let go of my face, he looked at me again and I couldn't help but blush. It was the most perfect, beautiful moment of my life; full moon, on a balcony, and a kiss. It was like a romantic movie.

"Does this mean you'll let me be with you?" I asked softly still in awe at what had just happened. There was then a pause for a few moments as he looked at me, but soon the answer I was hoping for appeared. He nodded. I gave him the widest smile I had ever given anyone. He smirked back.

"But you do have to promise me something," he said still looking into my eyes. I wanted him to look away for a second. It felt like he was reading my very thoughts at that moment, but I couldn't look away from him. I was just so hypnotized by his focus at me.

"And what's that promise?" I asked, but suddenly something moved through the trees beneath us. Draco immediately took out his wand and looked under. After minutes of panic, he sited the wand back in his jacket, and placed his hand on my back.

"I'll tell you inside, let's go," he said as he gently moved me towards his balcony doors.

As I stepped into his room I noticed that it was actually not very different from the Gryffindor rooms. I was surprised; I thought it would be a bit different since he was in a different house than mine.

"Where's Crabbe and Goyle?" I asked as I looked around the room.

"I really don't know . . . probably pushing some prefect around," he said as he faintly chuckled.

"Why didn't you go with them?" I asked.

"Didn't really feel like it," He said shrugging.

"That's not like you," I laughed.

"What do you mean?"

"Well come on! You're Malfoy . . . you love making people cry," I said jokingly. "But I guess I kind of know why you're not being yourself lately."

"Yeah, out of all the people at Hogwarts, Voldemort had to pick me. I mean . . .why me?!" He yelled as he started walking in circles around the room.

"That's a complicated question, just like the question of why Voldemort couldn't kill Harry Potter at the age of one," I said. Draco just looked at me as his nostrils began to flare and his eyes began to squint angrily.

"Don't even talk about Potter!" He spoke with force.

"Why are you so bothered by him?" I asked as I sat next to him on the bedside.

"Because, because-"

"I know why!" I said as I interrupted his thinking of a lame excuse. "It's because he doesn't let the fear of _death_ get in his way_, that's why_," I said. "And you are intimidated because you are frightened by him . . . It's an insecurity of yours isn't it?" I asked as I furrowed my brow. He then abruptly stood up.

"No . . . I have no insecurities, why would I be insecure? I just don't like him because he's a show-off, and no one likes a show off," he quickly said.

"Do you _know_ how I found out that I loved you?" I asked with emotion as I followed his move. He looked back waiting for the answer.

"It's because I saw you're emotions and because I found your insecurities," I said.

"I'm not scared of anything," he said with persuasive voice.

"_Stop _saying that! Show your fear . . . _Show _your sadness . . . and just _stop_ hiding your feelings from me!" I said. "I want to see them, so I can keep on loving you," I softly added as I reached my hand towards his. He just looked at me with despair. As soon as our hands were locked together, a feeling of warmth spread through my body. I felt like no power, no spell and no force in this world could stop us from letting go of each other. As soon as our hands touched, I didn't want to let go. We were like two parasites, that couldn't get enough of each other.

"It's normal to feel frightened. It's normal to cry from sadness, but it's not normal to run away from your feelings," I said again. "Especially now that I'm with you."

"I wanted you to promise me something though," he said.

"Anything," I whispered.

"Promise me that if I don't complete the mission, you will save yourself and leave Voldemort to kill me. Don't give your life up for me. If I . . ." he gulped loudly. "If Voldemort takes me to get killed . . . promise to not come after me," he said as he looked intensely into my eyes. I stood frozen in spot. I didn't want to think about him dying, and I didn't know if I could keep that promise, but if it meant being with him, then I had to.

"Okay," I finally said with fear in my eyes. "I promise."

* * *

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